It is estimated that bisexuals make up the majority of the LGBTQ community, and the Williams Institute and the Human Rights Campaign place that number at around 50%. Despite this, bisexual people are often erased from outside as well as from the LGBTQ community.
We are often called ‘greedy’ or ‘confused’ or even face extravagant claims that we are more likely to cheat or have an STD. So, on Bisexual Visibility Day, we would like to confront some of the myths surrounding the ‘B’ within our community.
- “Bisexuals are confused”
It could be said that this has some truth; bisexuals are very confused about how people do not understand our sexuality. We simply like more than one gender identity in the same way that people like more than one type of food, or just a television show.
2. “Bisexuals are greedy”
Continuing with the food analogy, just because someone likes different foods does not mean they want to eat them all the time, it just means that the option is on the table. If we were greedy, we would constantly chase someone, but many bisexuals are happy in committed relationships or simply do not chase anyone.
3. “Bisexuality is just a springboard to be gay”
For some people, bisexuality is a springboard, and that’s fine, but for many others it’s their sexuality. I dated as bisexual when I was 16/17 years old, and I still identify myself like that almost six years later. Looking back on my life, I had bisexual feelings in elementary school, I just didn’t recognize it at that time. As one wise person once said on the Internet: “For some, bisexuality is a journey, for others it is destiny.”
4. “Bisexuals are more likely to cheat”
There isn’t a single study out there that proves this. People of all sexual identities cheat, and it’s crap. But there is nothing to suggest that bisexuals are more likely to fool you than your own insecurities. And that depends on you, not us.
5. “Bisexuals are more likely to have an STD”
Bisexuals still know how to use protection, regardless of the gender identity of our sexual partner. Like the notion that we are more likely to cheat, this myth reduces us to sexual acts rather than recognizing that sexuality is only one aspect of a person’s identity.
6. “The bisexual attraction is 50/50”
Some bisexuals experience a 50/50 attraction to different gender identities, but many others have preferences. However, do not ask us for our ‘percentages’. In the first place, they are likely to change a lot instead of remaining static for the rest of the time, and secondly, we don’t need to justify our sexuality by giving an arbitrary figure that we probably thought about for two seconds. I just know that we are 100% bisexual.
7. “Bisexual people in relationships always think of other genres”
Homosexual and heterosexual people do not fall in love with someone just because they have the same or different gender identity. They fall in love with people because of their appearance, their personality or maybe because they have money. Bisexuals are exactly the same, it just means that your gender is not something that bothers us. If we secretly crave another gender, we would never be in relationships.
8. “You can only be bisexual if you are single”
Returning to the first point, this really confuses bisexuals. Our sexuality not only changes due to our partner, it is not a small meter that simply oscillates all over the place. We are bisexual no matter who we date.
9. “When a bisexual person settles, he has chosen”
Like the previous point, a bisexual is still bisexual regardless of who their partner is. If we have married a partner, it does not mean that we now exclusively like that gender, it only means that we have married our partner, as in any other relationship in which someone is married.
10. “Bisexuals are not attracted to trans people”
Trans women are women and trans men are men, and since bisexuals are attracted to men and women, there is no reason for bisexuality to erase the trans community.